AB Weekend Update & Celebrity Dead-Match

Sorry I didn't get up an AB on Friday; the work project enslaving the past three months of my life FINALLY took place on Friday. Made little time to get anything done, but I worked extra hard this weekend and got one made! So should be up by end of the day, And by the way, it's not an AB but very close. And will be for sale on CafePress too!

In the meantime, please enjoy finding out your dead celeb soul-mate, courtesy of Biography. It's very fun and toungue-in-cheek.

It was a touch call narrowing down my 3 bachelors, but I have to go with Edgar Allen Poe. Talented, sensitive, nice, morbid, and mysterious? Check. Now if I can only get him to forget Virginia and keep away from the booze...

Van Gogh is runner-up, because I weep at his paintings and he too is sensitive, but he has those nasty mood swings and appendage-slicing tendencies which are not so attractive.

And who knew that I could end up with Rudy Valli? (I suspect it's because under all my feministic modern woman-ness, I'm actually very romantic and housewife-y, which apparently was what he actually wanted in a woman. But playing housewife while my hubby charms other women does not appeal to me at all.)

When I tried it again I also got Da Vinci as a soul mate, but wasn't he gay? (Actually, since I often get crushes on effeminate though not swishy men, that doesn't sound too far off my normal romantic patters; meh to this quiz being horrifically accurate.)

The site's writing was so charming, I posted the info about each of my main bachelor picks below.

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:Candidate #1: Raven:
Hair: short and stylish
Body type: Amazingly Average
Location: Big City
Interests: Sefl-reflection, Family, fine Arts, Writing

Up Close with Candidate #1
My most humbling moment...
When my cousin and wife, the love of my life, Virginia, succumbed to tuberculosis. Oh, Virginia! A day naught goes by but I hear your sweet cry!

My greatest accomplishment...
There was this bird bothering me for some time, but I finally decided to write about it and ended up making a decent amount of money.

My ideal date would include...
After dinner slow and stately, as have been my dinners lately, we would sit and over coffee share our thoughts a little more. 'Til I'd note with fearful gasping, how your voice was gently rasping, rasping in a dusty tone, like Virginia long before. I'd have to see you... nevermore!

The celebrity I resemble most...
Harry Dean Stanton

If I could be anywhere at the moment...
At Virginia's graveside.

The book on my bedside table...
A collection of works by Edward Gorey and the first couple of volumes of the Lemony Snicket series.

The things I can't live without...
A novelty skull with a candle sticking out of the top (I forget who gave it to me); my cameo of Virginia

Fill in the blanks.
Madness is sexy...
melancholia is sexier.

In my home you will find...
An unusually new-looking brick wall, which you must never go near. A soft, moist spot on the floorboards, which you must keep covered by the rug at all times. A black cat, which you must feed regularly lest he torment you with the madness-inducing mews of hell. I call him Fluffertop.

Make the First Move:
What will you propose for your first date?
IUnvite him to the cemetery to do tombstone rubbings
Make a friendship poster out of posterboard and photograpohs cu out of magazines

Edgar Allan Poe responds...
"Why, why, oh why must you haunt my waking nightmares with your presence? I shall go mad. Madness! It consumes me! I must give in and agree to see you, or else I shall never find peace."

What your date might be like...
You might end up at the local library, or you might end up at the local Goth club. Either way, expect Poe to be quiet, reserved, and a bit shy. He's an elegant speaker when given the opportunity, but will usually try to avoid standing out in a crowd. For a modest but more enjoyable evening, take him to a quiet, unpopulated spot-- for instance, a cellar or a graveyard.

:Candidate #2: Sunflowers:
Hair: short and stylish
Body type: amazingly Average
LKocation: Farm, Small town, Big City
Interests: Praying, Receiving Visions, Writing, Family, Fine Arts

Up Close with Candidate #2
My most humbling moment...
The whole time I was painting regularly, I was only able to sell one canvas.

My greatest accomplishment...
One of my paintings, in today's dollars, is now worth over $116 million.

My ideal date would include...
First off, I promise I will not cut off anything while we're together. We could check out some galleries if you're interested. We could also watch a movie (anything but "Reservoir Dogs").

The celebrity I resemble most...
Jack Palance with red hair

If I could be anywhere at the moment...
In Arles, Bouches-du-Rhone, France. It's the perfect place for an art colony, if only I could convince other artists.

The book on my bedside table...
"The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat," by Oliver Sacks

The things I can't live without...
Brush, blade, canvas, my gauze-wrapped and dried up bit of ear

Fill in the blanks.
A young woman walking down the street is sexy...
the burning essence of living color all around us is sexier.

In my home you will find...
A lot of canvas, my paints, and some fresh sunflowers... sometimes they help cheer me up.

Vincent van Gogh responds...
"You are as brilliant and vivid as the sun! Let us make devastating beauty together!"

Make the First Move
Send Him Depresing e-mail complaining that no one at work understands your vision.
Send him a copy of the 7 habits of highly affective people and invite him to a self-help seminar

What your date might be like...
Dates with van Gogh are unpredictable-- you might end up having a perfectly nice afternoon picnic with him in the countryside, or you might end up in a shouting match with him in his bedroom, dodging any small objects he might throw at you. Van Gogh is a very passionate man, so it's possible that you will end up on the receiving end of a manic diatribe if you're not careful what you say. Most importantly: hide any sharp implements when you're around him.

:Candidate #3: DeliciousSheik:
Hair: Short and Stylish
Body type: Elfish
Location: Everywhere and Everywhere, Small Town, Traveling, Writing, Fine Arts

Up Close with Candidate #3
My most humbling moment...
Being called effeminate by a cowardly anonymous journalist in a Chicago newspaper. Porca miseria! I will show him manly! He should box with me and feel my manliness strike him across the face!

My greatest accomplishment...
From nothing-- no fame, no money, no family in America when I moved to New York City at 18, no job-- I became the most famous sex symbol the movies had ever seen. And I did it without saying a word!

My ideal date would include...
Only the best and most romantic activities. I love to dance, so for me a date would not be perfect unless we were first able to join together and move as one with the music of passion. I would then enjoy reading to you some of my poetry while we listen to my recordings of romantic songs in English and Spanish.

The celebrity I resemble most...
He doesn't look like me, not so much, but I was the Brad Pitt of my day. I should have made "Troy!" It would have been much more believable.

If I could be anywhere at the moment...
In my house, with a devoted wife, beautiful children, and my adoring dogs. To the public, I am perhaps a bit of a rascal, but all I really crave is domestic bliss.

The book on my bedside table...
I find most books to be dull and lacking insight, which is why I write my own poems. In fact, I have published a book of poetry, "Day Dreams," which was a best seller. I like to read from it from time to time and think about romance... romance with you!

The things I can't live without...
Your love! Your adoration! The beauty of one such as you bringing light to my life every day! Also, exclamation points and forceful hand gestures.

Fill in the blanks.
A woman at rest is sexy...
a woman in motion is sexier.

In my home you will find...
My beautiful dogs, an Irish Wolfhound named Centaur Pendragon, and a Doberman Pinscher named Kabar.

What will you proposrs for your first date?
Tell him you’ve begun taking tango lessons and want to find a dashing young man to try your new moves with
Ask him if that’s a dance belt he;s wearing or if he’s just ahppy to see you.

Rudolph Valentino responds...
"Ah, cara mia! Your very words make me al dente with desire! I would be honored and delighted to escort you to dinner, and perhaps afterwards, if you will permit me, I can teach you how to dance the sensual Argentine tango Valentino-style. (Do not worry, we will leave our clothes on for at least the first lesson.)"


What your date might be like...
If you've ever thought that European men were sexy then you'll love going on a date with Mr. Valentino. He's passionate, at ease with himself and all women, confident, and a superb dancer-- and he has an Italian accent! Mr. Valentino can be a little hot-headed at times and might deal with a perceived offense from a stranger by challenging the man to a boxing match or other physical test--but you can easily distract him from such displays of machismo by simply asking him for an impromptu dance lesson.

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Link found via the Candy ( I do go to other blogs, I swear!)